Saturday, February 12, 2011

One week in...!

It's been exactly one week since I arrived in Bolivia (and a few more since i´ve been able to finally post this) and…my thoughts are pretty much all over the place. I don't really have a lot of time to be alone with my thoughts, but when I do, there are a few things that seem like they are consistently on my mind. 
I keep going back and forth about the one year thing it seems like, it's been on my mind the past few days, weighing the good and the bad. I think, how can I possibly do this for a year? I already miss eating the food that I want, being in control of my own schedule, leaving whenever I want; pretty much the amenities and luxuries of my daily life that I took for granted. But on the other hand, I think I CANNOT believe i'm here, after all this time working towards this goal, I finally have my reward (the actual physically being here part). I am literally living my dream, and how many people get to say that? I'm trying to live in the moment and not future trip, but i'm not doing too well at the moment. I do know however, and have to remind myself everyday that I have someone much bigger and powerful than myself guiding my path, who gives me strength and serenity in my many times of weakness, and this is what gets me through the rough patches that are sure to come.

Also, I think about, how difficult it is to explain everything that is going on and everything that I'm  experiencing. All the little things that make it all worth while are so important, and it's going to be a little difficult to relay the significance of this information, but I want to try because I want to share my entire experience with you guys, not just the things that are easy to talk about. 

So i'll tell you all about my daily routine another day but I think that I said before how i'm partially in charge of the three littlest girls in the Hogar. Their names are Nataly, Carlita and Alejandra. These girls can be very difficult and trying to work with sometimes, well most, of the time but I live for the little moments when they let their guard down and forget they are supposed to have this rough and tough exterior. Their only 5 years old but they have already been conditioned by the other 123 girls in the Hogar. For instance, they have learned that when someone hits you, you hit them back 2X harder, which every minute it seems like. Things like this are hard to get used to, but I try to remember that i´m the  foreigner here and this place has been here long before I arrived and it will be here long after I leave, so I don't expect to change the whole place while i´m here or even one girl but I do know I am here to show an example of something different.

I keep hearing "horror" stories from Daniella, the Belgium volunteer that I am job shadowing, who as already been here for 8 months and will be leaving the beginning of March. I was warned when I first got here by another volunteer that Daniella has a very realist/pessimistic outlook on things and to take what she says with a grain of salt, more or less, so i'm trying to appreciate the forewarnings she has for me but at the same time realize that my experience doesn't have to be the same as hers, and it's not going to be. My biggest challenge right now is showing the girls that using force isn´t the only way to get things done (although it may be the easiest). I have heard that other volunteers have come here with the same intention, but this idea hasn´t seemed to stick. I can already tell though that the girls appreciate the respect that I show them, and I know i´m going to have to try very hard on the daily to keep up this attitude, as Sister Gloria would say, “Inspire them to do good.”

One thing that I look forward to every day is breakfast. It´s amazing how when I wake up in the morning, I have such a bleak outlook about the day, but after breakfast and a little bread and coffee in my stomach, I have a whole new view of the world. I have also learned that chocolate is the key for energy boosts here (which is now added to my long list of things to get at the supermercado in the city center). I should let everyone know that February is a very rainy month here so it hasn´t been as hot as it was when I first got here (Praise The Lord).

Lastly, I'm realizing now how important the little things are, pictures of family and friends that I took for granted, little reminders, and pictures from home, I brought a few but now I wish I would have brought more of everything. And speaking of bringing things with me, I wouldn´t mind receiving something in the mail, ANYTHING. hint hint.

I love you all! Keep me in your prayers!
Becca

PS For what it´s worth my address is: Rebecca Steichen Casilla 542 Santa Cruz de la Sierra, Bolivia J

1 comment:

  1. We love you and miss you, Becca! Will try to send a letter your way soon.

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